Category: Poetry

This was my first time performing since publishing my book. It was a beautiful moment.

Despite the strength in my pen,
I know these words won’t cause waves unless I say them to you
But I’ll still tell myself you like to read

We love each other like the children we are
Only able to express it with the simplest of words
because the naïve one inside is still new to this

How do we articulate complexity so simply
The weight behind ‘I’m in love with you’
pulling ‘I love you’ to the bottom of the sea

I heard someone loved someone else with purpose
and it stuck with me
Maybe love words can be complicated after all
Some liken their love to reflections in mirrors
and other halves
So I wonder how you articulate yours

We wonder what crosses their minds when they try to sleep
We wonder if they think of us

There’s a lot of loving and wondering in the air
so we can wear our masks if we want
There’s a yearning for freedom in the atmosphere
so I will go when I give myself permission
And I will keep going whenever freedom grows walls
that begin to encroach on me.

I’ll give life some time to untangle
while I accept there will always be a knot somewhere
I will use disorganised poetry
as a sign of disorganised thinking
A fire signal on your screen to pray for me if you still believe in God

How close am I to the jazz lounge
I’ve only ever seen it in my dreams
In the same way that I see him
When I close my eyes at night

When writing poems in the pages of novels
Peering out of windows from behind 3 monitors
All it takes is some jazz and rain
And I begin to wonder
If this is it

Surely there’s somewhere else I belong
Where I can slide into my dreams with ease

I wonder how long I can keep up this gag
Until the desire to express overtakes me
And I’ve no choice but to succumb.

At that point I’d be a slave to emotion
Incapable of turning my mind off
Losing myself in thought
Convincing others that it’s not a good thing

But proximity won’t let up
Because time only moves forward
And I know one day I’ll arrive,
The jazz lounge of my dreams

Open yourself up
even though that’s hard
find someone who
makes you believe
they want to see that side of you
that they can take it

allow them to be closed off to you
and stay down when
they throw you away
and tell you it was a
misunderstanding

think about them
for months afterwards

let them back in
when they knock again

repeat.

(good luck)

I don’t want to be realised
I want to be known from the beginning,
Fully understood and accepted
By those who want what’s beneath the surface