High on life



All I want to do right now is record happiness. I have never felt emotions switch so suddenly in my life and that’s no exaggeration. This time last week I felt there was a dark cloud over my head; I couldn’t figure out what was making me feel so low (though i did have a slight idea) and it was overbearing. But a few nights ago, my mood changed and I have been on a high since. Perhaps I should be worried by the immediacy of it all. But instead, I am embracing it. This is what it means to hold tight to your current loves as if you’ll never let them go.

Happiness has met joy and they are keeping me company. One of my favourite songs in the world is Evergreen by Yebba. I love when she says ‘Oh, I can’t see the forest for the trees. Oh, I feel so hopeless against the stream.’ That’s how it feels when you’re depressed, like there is no way out. When I feel like that, I wonder if I will ever feel happy again. Each time it feels genuinely impossible. And to be honest, I feel like I just got lucky with this sudden good mood I’ve been in.

In hindsight, a saving grace when I feel low may be the fact that there is a forest. In other words, a bigger picture to behold. And the bigger picture often tells me there’s more to life than anything I’m feeling, and there always will be. I must remind myself of this fact when I feel like I will never be happy again. Somehow, it eventually turns around. I’m marking the spot.

p.s: vision boarding works… things are coming to life!!

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